Last year, I got into an argument with two of my friends, one of whom does not believe in Global Warming (which I consistently remind him that Global Warming has now been rebranded as Climate Change - still no dice). Their argument - what's the point of Earth Hour since the electricity has already been generated? True - the electricity that is "saved" during Earth Hour has already been generated and if not used in that Earth Hour, would be used at a different time. However, turning off the lights helps in two ways: (1) Generating awareness on how much energy we use, some of which is unnecessary and (2) through that awareness, if it motivates people to use less energy, then the electric companies won't have to generate as much in the future. It's like getting rid of plastic bags - sure, the plastic bags are already made, but if people stop using them, grocery stores order less, which in turn makes manufacturers produce less.
Doubtful I'll ever be able to change my friends' views, however, I realize that there are still many ways for people to be an asshole during Earth Hour even if they don't turn on their lights at home. And here's how:
(1) Hum some Lionel Ritchie as you bathe.
It's dark, so what's more soothing (and possibly romantic) than to take a nice bubble bath with candlelight. Of course, you'll want to unload the dinner you just had - make sure to flush two or three times, as it's dark and you don't want to have the stench of pork and beans filling up your bubble bath environment. Make sure to make the water extra hot - you don't want to have the water go cold during your relaxing bath. Note: a bath uses about 3 - 5x more gallons of water than a shower - the bigger the tub, the more water you waste.
(2) Furnace, full blast - engage!
It's fucking cold outside, even for March. And in the dark, even snuggling under layers of blankets won't get you warm. So why not turn the furnace to full blast? This way, you can also share your heat with others in the building also observing Earth Hour. You're friendly and thoughtful.
(3) Canadian Idle.
So you're bored after your bath and snuggling under the blankets, you want to go outside for some fun! Forget public transit, you only have an hour - you don't want to be waiting at a bus stop for the majority of your time just so you can share a vehicle with commoners. Jump into your H3, go over to your local gas station, fill the tank and drive to some lookout point and idle that baby as you observe Earth Hour from a vantage point. Boy, the city does look beautiful all dim, especially when you have your highbeams pointed right at it.
(4) Grocery Shop til you Drop.
Go to your local grocery store. Buy a lot of exotic and imported food (you're so cultured and supporting people thousands of miles away!) and also plenty of items in non-recyclable containers. Go home and immediately throw all that food into the garbage. You don't need all those calories - what were you thinking?
(5) Shotput that trash.
Immediately take all of the packaging from your grocery shopping adventure and chuck it over your balcony. If nature's so great, it'll take care of it.
(6) Burn, baby burn.
Gather your leftover gas from your Hummer excursion, cut down some 100 year old trees in your neighbourhood and start a giant bonfire to bring the community together - hey, I know some great pagan ritual dances that will really get the party started.
(7) Chemical brothers and Expired Medicine - no, I'm not headed to a rave.
It's time to get rid of all those harmful chemicals in your cabinets and throw away all that expired medicine. What better way than to pour it down your drains and flush it down your toilets so that it helps clean up our water supply. Estrogen pills go bye bye - we all want bigger boobs right? This way, you're sharing the wealth with everyone as they sip our tap water.
(8) Clubbing - seal clubbing.
Okay, this might be difficult in major urban centres (unless you live by a zoo) but there's nothing more fun on a Saturday night than to beat some defenceless animals to death. Don't let their cute faces deter you. I believe a certain issue of German People magazine in 1937 voted Hitler as the Sexiest Man Alive...and we all know how he turned out.
(9) Timber!
So an hour might be pushing clear cutting a large swath of forest, but not if you get hundreds of like minded people involved. Teamwork makes things work faster. Plus, you'll have all the wood you need for activity #6.
So I've run out of activities one can participate in - but nonetheless, you get the point. You can still be a douchebag during Earth Hour, but hopefully we're all smarter than that. Be a part of the global movement and understand our actions have a big impact on others. By changing our daily routines, we can make a difference, and if by turning your lights off for one hour helps you turn off more lights throughout the year, well, then the Hour has helped.
PS - read a great article in Fast Company about companies participating in Earth Hour. Really - can't they make more of an effort. It's just an hour.
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