With this vote, I protest this election.

Yesterday was the first of three advanced voting days (you can also vote today and on Monday as well). As a person recovering from a nasty cold and nothing else better to do, I went to vote as I'm pretty sure that when May 2nd comes around, I'll be so angry with the political parties I might refuse to go vote.

I got to the polls - conveniently located a kilometer from my house - to the clearly labelled, yet oddly confusion arrow signs that pointed me to the washrooms as opposed to the central room that the voting was taking place. Nonetheless, I'm a smart person, I figured out that the stall was not where I was supposed to vote.

I get greeted by one of three greeters sitting around. Of the 15 polls located in the community centre, there were at least 45 elections officials sitting around, on their cell phones or chatting up a storm with one another. The greeter asks me, "are you here to vote?" The asshole side of me would have answered, "No, I'm here to partake in craftmaking," but I replied with a smile and "yes."

He directed me over to my polling station where I'm greeted by a man with a handlebar moustache who is on his cell phone. After looking at me with a confused look, I stated, "I am here to vote." He politely asked the person on the other end of the call to hold on for a moment and tells me that I'll have to wait until his companion at the polling station came back from the washroom. I asked, "can't another person from another polling station (not two feet away) substitute for her?" He said, "No, it's the rules," and went back to his call. So after waiting 4 minutes for his polling co-worker to take the longest dump ever, and twittering my displeasure of having to wait at the polls, she returns. A spry woman, she looked like Uma Thurman in the Batman where she played Poison Ivy.

After taking my driver's license and my voting card, it took them another five minutes to go through the voter's list, write my name down on the advanced voters list and hand me my ballot. Did I mention that these people are being paid between $14 - $20 / hour for this speedy service?

Regardless, I'm just happy to get to vote. I get into the booth and look at my ballot with six names on it. There are the four major party candidates and two fringe party candidates (there's actually a Marxist-Leninist candidate in my area!).

As I go to mark my X beside the Conservative Party candidate, I hesitated. I thought this would have been an easy vote for me, but I had a minute of deep reflection as to why I should give this party my vote. They've produced a platform that was as weak as their budget, they have a leader who refuses to answer any direct questions from the media, and now stories of more corruption and scandal that would make the Liberal's Sponsorship scandal look like a legal transaction. As much as I believe that we need a strong majority government, this was not the party to do so.

So I consider marking my X for the Liberal candidate and wince at the thought that Michael Ignatieff would be PM. The Liberal platform is just as bad as the Conservatives, with funding calculations using parts of the Conservative budget they defeated to cause this election. This guy has also flip flopped on the idea of coalitions, which shows me he'll do whatever it take to gain power - similar to Stephane Dion, his doomed predecessor. I couldn't justify my vote for him.

Then I go to Olivia Chow - who I think has done quite a bit for our riding and was the only candidate who approached me with a flyer near my building. But I could never justify a vote for the NDP, not after what they did to Ontario in the 1990s under Bob Rae's leadership.

I thought about giving my vote to the Greens - perhaps throw them my $1.95 / vote funding that they so desperately need. But Elizabeth May has made less than a rat's fart of a contribution to these elections. They certainly didn't have the same gusto as they did back in 2008. So no, not them either.

Now, while it seems like an eternity has gone by at the booth, it's only been really 10 - 15 seconds. 10 - 15 seconds of me going through the disgust I had with all the parties and wondering why we're even having this election in the first place. I highly doubt seat counts will change much, the Conservatives will still have a minority government and the same leaders will be back to behave in the same manner as they would have before this election.

Then I did what I thought I'd never do. I drew a line across my ballot, spoiling it. My own protest against this election. I protest the fact that there is an election, I protest the fact that these parties have not spoken to my needs during these elections, and I protest that these are the leaders of our political parties - petty, whiny assholes. I protest that my regular vote for the party of my choice doesn't count in my overly NDP/Liberal riding. I protest the fact that we will have another minority government after having 3 failed attempts because our politicians can't cooperate. I protest the current state of Canadian politics.

I slight disbelief that I just spoiled my ballot, I walk to the ballot box and quickly placed the ballot in before I changed my mind. After a "thank you for voting," from the poll workers, I left the polling station in a state of shock and giddiness, like a child who knows he's done something to defy his parent's wishes.

I encourage the rest of you to vote - take Monday as an opportunity to take some time out of your day and cast your ballot (your employer must legally allow you this time off). If you don't vote on Monday, vote the following Monday like everyone else. And if you're as pissed off with the parties as I am, think about spoiling your vote. It is your right to do so.