January Challenge - Day 28: And it's over as quickly as it began.

Dear Nay-sayers,

I win. Suck it.

Love, Terence.

Hahaha...just kidding (not really). There were points where I doubted that I could last 28 days. While this was a nice challenge to start off the year with, I can't imagine it going on much longer. I am pretty grateful I don't belong to a religion that forbids indulging in alcohol or god forbid, I was allergic to alcohol in any way.

What did I learn from the last 28 days? First, I have the discipline to say no, even when everyone around me is drinking. Proof of that was at the Yahoo! party. Second, it's not so bad to have a drink once in a while, just don't have as many as I would normally have. From now on, I'll try to cut down to only two glasses of whatever drink I'm drinking when I go out. And finally, I probably won't be doing something like going without drinking for quite some time, I love me a glass o' wine.

Tomorrow I will start blogging about how I will face my healthy eating February challenge. I have already started with pre-cooking my meals for the next three days as I know it's going to be a challenge to find the time to cook during the week.

How will I keep to a 2,000 calorie a day diet? Stay tuned to find out.

January Challenge - Day 27: One more day...one day more!

With day 28 just around the corner (less than 3 hours in fact), I am starting to look forward to my next 28 day challenge. Eating healthy.

I imagine the next 28 days (starting February 1st) will be much harder than these past 28 days. No doubt, I had my challenges this month (including the awesome Yahoo! party) but food has always been something I've struggled with. I have little to no food discipline - thank god I decided to start working out a couple of years back, or else I would be one of those crying fatties on the Biggest Loser.

Well, as one chapter of my challenge comes to an end, another one begins. I stumbled across this photo on the net - this will likely be me on Jan 31st, the day I lift my alcohol ban.

January Challenge - Day 26: Stuff Drunk People Like

Oops - forgot to post yesterday. While it's no excuse, I was out late after catching dinner and a movie with my friend Sabina. We went to see The Fighter, which is an incredible movie, I highly recommend you to go and watch it before the Oscars to see why Christian Bale will win the Oscar for his performance.

Before the movie, Sabina and I hung out at the Indigo around the corner, where we struck up a conversation with a random girl who I thought kept talking to us after we turned down a different aisle, and Sabina decided to buy the book "Stuff White People Like." It's fucking hilarious. Based off of a blog started off by McGill grad, SWPL is a humourous look at things that bring white people pleasure like Camping, TED conferences, and Ugly Sweater parties. For a full list, visit the blog here.

This blog inspired me to start a list of things drunk people like...

1) Falling down - like Deena from Jersey Shore did on last week's episode, falling down is one of the favourite activities of drunks. Whether or not someone is there to catch their fall, drunks will at one point during the evening take a tumble down a flight of stairs, trip over "loose" tile or slip on an imaginary puddle of water.

2) Talking really loud - especially at already loud night clubs. Volume control goes out the window when drunks have had one too many. One wants to say gently to their drunk friend, "dude, I'm right here. Stop shouting."

3) Laughing at everything - a simple word or action will send drunks into a gig

gling fit. While most people don't find the response of "yes" funny in any way, drunks will double over and roll around on whatever disease ridden floor they are on.

4) Destroying coasters - what have these innocent coasters ever done to you? After any night at a pub, waitresses preside over a cleanup of the nightly Coaster Genocide.

5) Ruining perfectly good photos - stupid drunken faces will serve to destroy any good group party photo. To describe it as a photo bomb does not serve it justice.

6) Unbuttoning shirts or losing a piece of clothing - we have all seen those people at the clubs with their shirts unbuttoned and untucked or the slutty ladies who have hiked up their skirts (or in some cases, have pulled their shirts down to compensate for their missing skirts). The drunks then wake up the next morning and wonder, what happened to my favourite piece of clothing?

7) Spilling - drunks have little to no coordination so they often spill their drinks which leads to point #1 - falling. Spilling does wonders for the bar tab because after one twirl on the dancefloor, the drunks are back at the bar for another drink.

8) Double fisting - #7 leads right into #8. After learning their lesson with spilling, drunks then develop some higher level thinking and ponder, "I'd have to go to the bar fewer times if I double (sometimes triple) up on drinks.

9) Swearing - while most of us curse like sailors to begin with, swearing gets turned up a notch when people are drunk. It's not common to hear a sentence like, "Man, I fucking like, fucking love you. You are my fucking bro, dude, you are like the one I go to when shit hits the fucking fan and like assholes fucking try to get up in my face."

10) Slurring - soon enough, after #2 and #9 are over, the slurring begins. Soon, sentences become murmurs, murmurs become mumbles. And then, you become incoherent, speaking more in tongues than any actual language.

10 is all I can think of right now, I might add to this list later...

January Challenge - Day 25: The Day After and the Photos You Regret Taking

We've all had that shocking realization the day after a heavy night of drinking. What the fuck, who took that photo and why is it on Facebook?

As an avid photographer, I often take my camera on nights out with friends. And as an avid facebooker, I often post my photos right when I get home. Then the next morning, I get frantic facebook comments saying "delete" or "OMG, why did you post this?!" I always remove photos the moment someone asks me to remove it (that's also why I never tag people either - some people are not so happy with bad photos showing up on their news feed).

After last night's ridonkulous Yahoo! party, many sober (and mostly hungover) attendees were shocked to find their drunken photobooth photos online. Hopefully these people realize that these images are forever on the net and their co-workers will see them in their most embarrassing moment.

Here are top five examples of what NOT to do when you know photos might get placed on the internet:

5. Sure, sure, sure, sure, unsure, unsure, unsure, unsure.

Just as one of the best deodorant commercials ever for Sure said, "be Sure to be dry." No one likes to see wet pits, and the camera is not too kind.

4. My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.

Cleavage can serve purpose at times. Too much cleav is just trashy. Especially if you point to it.

3. Motorboating

Related to point #4, motorboating have been a fun activity last night with your loved one, but in public, burying your face into someones boobage (man or woman) often cause stares of judgment. If you really want milk that badly, my suggestion is to go to the bar and order some.

I guess some people just have never gotten over their breastfeeding faze. I would let those trying to suckle at the male teet, that they will more likely get more armpit odour than any milk.

2. Know your best light. Make it simple.

99% of us don't know how to use the light to our advantage when taking photos. The other 1% are models who do. Here is a perfect example of someone not knowing what to do with light, its either that or she was going for a Casper the friendly ghost look.

Mistake number two comes into trying to accomplish too many things for one picture. She was clearly trying to rush in and smile at the same time, but she was caught in the moment of rushing in causing her to look like she is about to sneeze or squeeze out a poo.

Better luck next time Casper. Better luck next time.

1. Dry humping.

When asked, what do you want to do when you grow up, some people answer: "porn star." Not all of us can aspire to greatness, so they have to substitute their dreams by acting out their fantasy occupation in a public environment in front of a camera.

Lindsay Lohan-alike was by far the funniest person in front of the camera. She was blitzed and was a great sport when my friend Jean and I shouted out suggestions as to what they should do. It was beyond our wildest imagination that they would do something like Doggie Style (we did not suggest this) in front of a room of 45 people. Let's hope they aren't co-workers...it would make for a very awkward watercooler conversation in the kitchen the next morning.

January Challenge - Day 24: I did not break!

Today was the day. The day of the big Yahoo! party. The moment came to see if I was going to break my 28 day challenge on Day 24. As the title gives away, I did not break!

I credit this to many things: understanding co-workers and media colleagues who did not pressure me to drink once (some gave me props for not breaking), I replaced drinking with yummy food, and I danced my ass off.

So, there's nothing funnier than seeing drunk people around you making a fool of themselves. There were several examples tonight including:

- a guy at the photo booth dancing like an overweight Michael Jackson

- a girl at the photo booth dry humping the overweight Michael Jackson from behind

- that same girl falling over and taking people down with her

My co-worker, Jean George and I were totally egging these two on. Giving them directions at the photo booth like "you're a tiger!" or "do Charlie's Angels!" or "ride him like a cowboy!"

Man, tonight was fun. Proximity peeps - you know how to party!

January Challenge - Day 23: Tomorrow...tomorrow, will I crack, tomorrow?

I feel as if I am looking off a cliff tonight. Tomorrow is Day 24.

Tomorrow is also the Yahoo! Canada party. The drunkeness and the baffoonery will be rampant. I'm really hoping they bring back the photo booth from last year (see photo) as that was the best part of the entire evening.

I shall be stuffing my face with food tomorrow, using that to distract me from the fountains of purple martinis that will be served. My co-workers will be super trashed, and I'll be the only sober one.

Sigh, perhaps I'll act drunk. Pray for me folks.

January Challenge - Day 22: Some people can really really drive you to drink.

After my session at the gym tonight, I went down to my storage closet to pick up an item I needed for my condo. This is the scene that greeted me. The moron who has the locker beside me locked their bike infront of my door. I can't get in. What a fucker. People like this make you so angry, that it makes you want to drink.

Other people that annoy me to this point? Here's a list:

- slow walkers that take up an entire walkway

- stupid customer service reps

- TTC ticket booth collectors

- loud cellphone users

- people who block public transit entrances (in fact, everyone on public transit annoys me)

- people who ask for your opinion, but never take it

I'm sure I can go on. I just don't want to increase my blood pressure any higher than it already is.

January Challenge - Day 21: Incredibly Productive Day

I must admit, not having woken up on a Sunday with a hangover is quite nice. Not that this is a normal occurrence, but I do remember several times (especially back to my days at Western) where Sunday mornings meant recovery and nothing else.

So today, the end of my 3rd week of no drinking, was a nice reminder of how much one can accomplish in a day, when not hampered by a nasty hangover. First, I made a nice breakfast for myself at 730, jumped in the shower at 750 and was out the door to Sobey's by 8. It was a ghost town in there - awesome, no lines! After putting my groceries away, I cleaned my living room and dining room. Not sure what to do with myself, because it was now just only 9am (when most recovering drunks are still buried face deep in their pillows), I was off to the gym for a two hour workout - focus today, core and cardio.

Tic-tock, it's 11:15 (after another shower of course), and I'm out the door to go to my photography class that I purchased via LivingSocial. Mango Studios (located at Richmond and Brant) is a neat little workshop that not only hold large group photo 101 learning sessions, but also one-on-one instruction on how to use your camera. They also do custom framing and all types of photography. The instructors were super nice and incredibly helpful, so I certainly recommend that if you are thinking of taking a class to brush up on your SLR skills, this is a nice place to go.

During the class, I realized how little I knew about photography, even after years of taking copious amounts of photos and even working at Black's Photography during high school. But the lesson was quite inspiring and what I took away from it was to tell better stories with my photos and not just take photos for photo's sake or to upload another album to Facebook.

This course certainly comes in handy as there are several weddings to attend this summer, a possible vacation to Morocco, and a 28 day challenge in July/August in which I have to capture one unique photo in the city.

My favourite photo of the day has to be these lampshades that were located in the lobby of our testing facility. Not only did the camera capture the light well, but now that I see them, they look like giant corktops from giant wine bottles.

January Challenge - Day 20: Sports games with no booze = no fun

Okay, I'll admit it, I'm not the biggest sports fan. I mean, I can get fanatical about sports, like I did during the Vancouver Olympics, where I kept up with every game Team Canada played.

However, for our local sports teams, it's hard to get super excited when they continue to lose all the time. So watching the Leafs play the Capitals tonight, it was extremely to sit through it all without a beer in my hand.

Luckily, I had good company. My friend Franky, who does follow the Leafs, was a great educator of who's who on the team. Also, I was texting back and forth with Amber complaining about how much the Leafs sucked. Luckily for her, she was wasted, which I think was the only way to get though the tragedy that was the 4 - 1 loss.

I pledge I will not go to another sports game and not drink. Especially at baseball games. Man - baseball games are boring.

January Challenge - Day 19: Addicted to food

Day 19 - 9 days left before I complete this challenge! So close yet so far away. However, I am starting to dread next month's challenge of eating healthy. With no access to alcohol this month, I quickly turned to another source of instant gratification - food. Fast food, processed food, every type of food I can get my hands on. This past Tuesday, while watching The Biggest Loser (of all shows) I heffed out on two Haagen Daas ice cream bars, and all this after eating McDonald's for dinner, and some cake and cookies at a friend's house beforehand. Total calorie count - a kabillion.

While I'm still formulating what I can/cannot eat during my Healthy Eating month, a bead of sweat starts to form on my brow...really, what am I getting myself into? I mean, liquor is easy to say no to compared to food. Food is everywhere, especially in my desk at my office - I have a drawer devoted to chocolate.

Just thinking of next month's challenge makes me want to drink to relieve the stress. This is why New Year's resolutions never work!

*Photo credits go to Stef Fabich for capturing my gluttony.

January Challenge - Day 18: Not feeling well

My head is pounding. I can only imagine it's not going to get any better. It's comparable to some of the worst hangover headaches I've ever had. I really hope I'm not getting sick, but this is probably the case. There's a lingering sickness hanging around at work - it's either that or I caught it from some sicko on the TTC.

UGH, I feel like crap. I guess I should take some advice from the t-shirt I wore today and cheer up...it could be worse.

January Challenge - Day 17: The after work drink, why it's so necessary

It's been a bit of a marathon these days at work. Productive, yes. Tiring also. Which is why I realize a beer or a drink after work is so incredibly necessary in order to unwind.

As more and more of my co-workers find out about my 28 day challenge of no drinking, shock is the first reaction. "Really? WHY?" is what follows. Then, many scoff that I can actually complete this task and offers me a drink. I almost took them up on the offer today, it was so tempting.

I don't really know the point of this post - I guess I'm super tired and can't think of anything to rave or rant about. Something tells me I need to go to sleep soon. Sorry folks for this jibber jabber.

January Challenge - Day 16: On a more serious note...

I want to take a bit of a break from blogging about my non-drinking ways and talk about something a bit more serious and also has a big health impact, especially for young men.

A couple of months back, Movember took Canada by storm. Men in Canada sprouted moustaches to raise awareness and money for Prostate Cancer (including myself - my coworkers have begged me never to do Movember again). This month, the Canadian Testicular Cancer Association is trying to turn January into Manuary, a campaign to create awareness for testicular cancer.

They even have an article in this month's MacLean's magazine that highlights the organization and how they plan on raising money and awareness during Manuary (see the article to the right).

Testicular cancer is the most common form of cancer in men between the ages of 15 and 29. This is not an old person's disease like Prostate Cancer, young men are mostly affected by this easily treatable cancer (a 97% success rate in curing if detected early).

Most men never think of testicular cancer because at this age, because they rarely go to the doctors - we feel it's a sign of weakness and a threat to our manhoods (I can totally attest to this). We also never think it will happen to us - we think we're invincible at this age.

I personally have not known anyone around me suffer from testicular cancer, but I've seen other cancers ravage and ultimately take the lives of many people that I care about. This is why it's so important to make people aware of the easy steps they can take on a regular basis to prevent cancers like this from taking your life.

Let's be honest, men have no problem with playing with themselves. If they only took the time to check themselves for testicular cancer with the same dedication, the likelihood this cancer will take a life will decrease significantly.

I watch a great medical series from the UK on YouTube (it's called Embarrassing Bodies, it used to be called Embarrassing Illnesses) and they have a great video on how you can check your balls. Caution, there is nudity, and you'll likely giggle. But if there's anything you can take away from this video, it is the knowledge of understanding your body and checking for the warning signs so that testicular cancer won't take your life. Here is the clip below.

Embarrassing Bodies - How to check your testicles (*WARNING: This clip does contain scenes of nudity. Giggles and shocked faces will occur.)

January Challenge - Day 15: Blue Monday

Oh, Blue Monday. The 3rd Monday of January, which is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year. Why? Well, two weeks into everyone's New Year's, and no one is holding true to their unattainable resolutions. Fatties have stopped exercising and have opened up that bag of chips, smokers have begun to fill their lungs again with the sweet, sweet clouds of carcinogenic fumes, and lazy parents who've promised to spend more time with their kids stay later and later at work to avoid their nagging anklebiters.

Surprisingly, I seem to be holding true to my resolution and holding on strong through day 15. Also surprising was how Blue Monday wasn't so blue at all. Last week was a bit of a gong show, but today was relaxed and calm. The pessimist in me is staying cautious, wondering, "oh no, what will happen tomorrow..." but all in all, I didn't have a devil on my shoulder today, telling me, "it's okay, just one sip."

How did everyone else's Blue Monday go? Do share!

January Challenge - Day 14: Golden Globes night with no booze

I've officially hit my halfway point in my 28 day challenge. Hurrah! Who knew I could make it this far? With 14 days left to go and a big Yahoo! party smack dab in the centre, the biggest challenge is yet to come.

On another note, tonight, the Golden Globes are on. Yes, it's that time of year that Hollywood starts giving out awards and I get giddy watching my favourite stars and movies win those awards. The Golden Globes, while not having the stature of the Oscars, is by far the best to watch because of all the funny moments that have happened. Especially around drinking. The Golden Globes is the only award show that allows drinking while the awards are going on. Who can forget this great moment when Ricky Gervais introduces Mel Gibson (Ricky, by the way is hosting tonight's awards):

Catch all the action live at 8pm on CTV or NBC. I will also be reporting live, from my couch, and offering my two cents on speeches, dresses and people. Catch that live on Facebook.

January Challenge - Day 13: Meh

I'm close to the 1/2 way mark, it's almost a full two weeks since I've stopped drinking. Pretty impressive I would have to say considering that I've been to three bars and out to several restaurants (including hot pot tonight) where there are constant reminders of drinking, such as this sign posted right at our table tonight:

How tempting.

No matter - I held my ground and sipped on the Crysanthemum tea that was provided (or whatever that yellow icy liquid was in my cup). And now, I have to pee.

January Challenge - Day 12 - How to act drunk gooder

Being sober at a boozefest or bar is terribly depressing. Not only is everyone around you actin' a fool, you actually have to stand around and deal with their stupidity.

I've had this happen to me before:

1) being a designated driver,

2) on medication,

3) on an alcohol-free challenge

Okay, so #3 applies to me right now. I had to meet a friend's friend, who is interested in advertising at a bar tonight to answer some of her questions she had about advertising. (I say "had" because after the session I think she decided not to go into advertising...hahaha.) Too bad when I made these plans to meet up with her, it was before I decided to go on this cleanse.

So not only was everyone around me was drinking wine, beer or some mixed drink, I sat there sipping an iced tea, wishing it was rather a Long Island Iced Tea. In situations like this, wouldn't it be better just to pretend to be drunk?

There are a lot of benefits to pretend drunkeness:

1) you can get away with being an idiot

2) you fit in

3) you can claim you don't remember anything you did the next day

4) you can leave a terrible social situation by claiming you're so wasted, and then go home and enjoy watching TV in your Snuggie

But there are some techniques you can use so that people don't find out that you're pretending drunkeness:

- drink pop (coke is usually the best)

- slur your speech every 2 words: "What arrrreeee you talking boout?"

- add a chuckle, laugh or silent face laugh after anything someone else says (even if it's not meant to be funny like "my dog died today.")

- point at people and stick your pointing finger in their chest like you're

scolding them, but in a fun way

- unbutton a button

- sweat profusely (dance up a storm or sprinkle some water if you can't produce that much body water)

- take douchebaggy pictures (see right) by stretching your face like you don't know where you are

- burp loudly

- hug and declare your love for everyone

Follow some of these simple instructions and you'll fit in with your drunken party people immediately.

Enjoy!

January Challenge - Day 11: Jersey Shore liver

So another guilty pleasure of mine came back last week - Jersey Shore. Another season of eight drunken 20 somethings fighting, screaming and stumbling from their gym, then the tanning salon and finally, to the laundromat. This season started off with a bang when one cast member's fist made contact with another cast member's face.

I won't get into too many details of this season - I will let you discover the joy of Jersey Shore for yourself. Watching this show makes me wonder, have these people signed themselves up on the liver transplant list already? Every frame of every episode (during the day, mid-day, evening) they all have red drinking cups in their hands and every night, they are out at a club.

What drives them to drink? Well, it's a vicious cycle. They sleep all day, get up, get a drink, fight because they are drunk, go out to blow off steam, get more drunk, go home, pass out and do it all over again. And we, as sick voyeurs, lap up every moment of it. Our sick obsession of watching them results in the cast members getting paid tens of millions of dollars in appearances and book deals, to which they use that $$ on more boozing and partying.

Thankfully, I will never reach Jersey Shore levels in my lifetime, even in my wildest bingefests. However, I do get a sick sense of enjoyment watching their drunken antics and secretly judging them.

January Challenge - Day 10: Is SHE drunk?

We all say silly things when we're drunk. I have on many occasions said things that I wish I could take back. Damn you, alcohol. You are a good friend and a terrible enemy at the same time.

So it amazes me that there are people who say silly things when they are dead sober. You often wonder to yourself, "is dis fool drunk?" Sarah Palin is the fool in this case. Today, she posted a video to her blog to respond to the horrific shooting that took place in Arizona this weekend. Take a look - especially at 2:18 where she addresses the controversy of her previous targeting swing districts in the last congressional elections with crosshairs on the congressmen and women who were at risk of losing their seats (including Democrat Gaby Giffords, who was shot this weekend).

As my homegirl GloZell says, "guurrrlll, how drunk IS you?" Look, you made a mistake. Own up to it - it's a time where people are going to look for someone to blame, but if you own up to the fact that you made a tasteless attempt at partisan politics, people are also in the mood to forgive. Her "my hands are clean" approach is pitiful, and shows again that she is a terrible candidate to be the leader of the most powerful nation in the world. Hopefully, there's one good thing that comes out of the shooting and that it destroys any chance this moron has of reaching the White House.

I'm irritated. It might be a combination of watching this moron's video and the fact that I really want a nice cold beer. Sigh, Day 10. 18 days left to go!

January Challenge - Day 9: I miss the LCBO.

On my way home today, I was distracted by a few things - first, I picked up a great book at Indigo about raising children under a Chinese household (no, I'm not having kids soon) and second, a couple in front of me was having the most horrendous public display of affection convo ever.

Needless to say, I missed my streetcar stop. I had to get off at King and Spadina, where bam, there's an LCBO right in my face.

I have to say, I love the LCBO. I remember back in the 90's when my parents would drag me to the neighbourhood LCBO, it was dark, with terrible layout and the staff knew little to nothing about their wines. And in the early 2000s, everything changed - they opened up new locations, bigger, brighter and with more knowledgable staff. Really, one of the best brand turnaround case studies in Canada.

For me, walking around the LCBO is like a guy's guy walking around Home Depot, or a woman wandering around in a shoe store. I'm a kid in a candy store - with candy that will fuck you up.

I can imagine that if the LCBO was a person, it would have probably written me a letter by now (similar to what is pictured above - yes, I wrote that note for comedic effect). Sorry LCBO, it's not you, it's me. I'm quitting you for 28 days. Day 9 - just 19 more days to go!!!

PS - I would actually be really concerned if the LCBO wrote me a letter. I pray that never happens.